Inspirational Writing # 4

James A. Gold

Accept everything about yourself-I mean everything-not some things-everything. Every feeling, idea, hope, fear, smell, appearance-it is you and it is good...You can do anything you choose to do; you can enjoy anything you choose to take part in, to be aware of. You are you and that is the beginning and the end-no apologies, no regrets-you are what you want- because you are you-and who can doubt that-who could want more-you have everything there possibly is-there is no more-you are everything-and you are so large and immense that you could never find the top or bottom-you will spend a lifetime enjoying the search-you will enjoy every minute-there is so much to know and experience within yourself.

Praise

If with pleasure you are viewing, anything a man is doing,

If you like it, or you like him, tell him now, Don't delay your approbation for the funeral ovation, As he lies with snow white lilies o'er his brow. For no matter how you shout it, he won't know a thing about it, He won't know how many teardrops you have shed. If you think some praise is due to him, now's the time to tell it to him, For he'll never smell your flowers when he's dead, Nor will he read the tombstone o'er his head.

The poem above, titled Tell Him Now appears in Frank Tibolt's book, A Touch Of Greatness. It captures the importance of giving praise in a beautiful way.

Too often we are stingy in our praises and too generous in disparage of others. It is always easy to find a fault in someone. Everyone has one. It takes a little bit of effort to see the positive in others but it is worth it. Studies after studies in human behavior have found that giving praise works better in raising productivity than criticism.

Learn to give praise and not flattery. Flattery is cheap and dishonest and often used by those with hidden agendas and malicious intent. If someone has done good, tell him or her. Everyone can do with a little pat in the back.

Remember that everyone is fighting their own battle and a giving praise to whatever achievement, big or small, rekindles the spirit.

Keep Your Brain Fit

The human brain is a fantastic organ and its importance cannot be overstated. Like all other organ in our body it must be kept fit. The human brain follows a very simple rule of fitness. Use or lose it. Researchers studying the human brain say that the brain can be kept fit even at a very old age. Studies have also shown that an active brain can prevent mental disease such as Alzheimer's. The importance of a fit brain cannot be overstated and listed below are several steps you can take to keep your brain stimulated.

1. Learn a new task. Learning new things keeps the brain engaged. It helps to grow new connections in the neural network. Examples include a new language, a new software program or yoga. You can also start a new hobby.

2. Travel. Traveling is a very good way to keep the brain stimulated. The early human race led a nomadic lifestyle and this provided a plethora of stimulation. Our ancestors had to keep upgrading their tools and survival skills constantly to new environments.

3. Neurobics. Created by Lawrence C. Katz, Ph.D, a professor of neurobiology and co-author of the popular book Keep Your Brain Alive - 83 Memory Exercises to Help Prevent Memory Loss and Increase Mental Fitness. Neurobics are simple and fun brain exercises. Some exercises you can include in your daily life are:
a. Get dressed with your eyes closed
b. Wash your hair with your eyes closed
c. Share a meal and use only visual cues to communicate
d. Eat with your opposite hand
e. Go to work in a new route

4. Read. Reading is to the brain like what a gym workout is to the body. Crossword puzzle also gives the brain a good workout

5. Exercise. A sedentary lifestyle is not only bad for the body but also the brain. A large number of studies have shown that aerobic exercises such as walking, jogging and cycling, benefits the brain in the short and the long term.

The Action Habit

The ability to get things done is the one ability that talent, hard work or even genius can't surpass in the quest for success. Having a sound idea is important but not enough. Acting on that idea and translating it into reality will give it value. Many man and woman are doing very well for themselves today because they took action on an idea they had. If you want to join them then you must develop the action habit.

David Schwartz in The Magic of Thinking Big lists 7 steps to grow the action habit.

1. Don't wait for the perfect condition. There never be a perfect condition. Take the plunge and solve problems as they arise.

2. Remember that ideas alone are not enough. There is a huge difference in knowing what to do and doing what you know.

3. Take action and cure fear. Just do it and watch your fear disappear.

4. Start your mental engine mechanically. Move your spirit, dig in and take action.

5. Live in the present. Develop the now mentality.

6. Get down to business. Don't just get ready to act. Act.

7. Take the initiative. Pick the ball and run. Go and slam dunk it.

Inspirational Writings # 3

While rummaging through some old newspaper clippings I came across an inspiring piece of writing. Titled Desiderata, it was witten by Max Ehrman (1872-1945) in 1927. I have reproduced here for your reading pleasure. Enjoy.

"Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble, it's a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantement, it is as perrenial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."

Being Sacked

One rainy December morning, I found myself out of a job.

After two months of rumours flying around the office cubicles that some of us will have to go, it finally happened. I did hear my name was among the disposables but no one knew for sure. I was in a very uncertain position and uncertainty does funny things to your head. To keep my own sanity I avoided thinking about it and tried my best to focus on my job. I thought of all the qualities I had and naively concluded that I will not be sacked. Well, I was and what a time to be sacked. The Eid Fitr was just four days away, my wife was six months pregnant and there was not much left in the savings account.

I was disappointed initialy but it did not last long. To my surprise, I felt a sense of relief. Rather than being uncertain, I knew I am definitely out of a job and I need to concentrate in looking for work. After two months of searching. I found myself a better paying job than the one I was released from.

Looking back now I would say the whole thing made me stronger. Being fired is a not pleasant situation to be in but this sort things happens. If you find yourself out of job, the suggestions below might be of help.

1. Keep a cool head. Don't go on a rampage.

2. Finalize the paperwork. Find your severance package and make sure everything is in order.

3. Leave quietly. This is not the time for hugs and kisses. You can call your close colleagues later.

4. Look forward to the future. Avoid being nostalgic.

5. Learn the lesson. Analyse why you were fired and do the necessary if the fault lies in you.

Don't despair, being laid-off may seem to be a disaster but it can turn up to be a blessing in disguise.

Writings on Self Esteem

Self-Esteem ~ Hindu Scriptures. First Century B.C

Oh, let the self exalt itself,
Not sink itself below;
Self is the only friend of self,
And self self's only foe.

For self, when it subdues itself
befriends itself. And so
When it eludes self-conquest, is
Its own and only foe.

So calm, so self-subdued, the self
Has an unshaken base
Through pain and pleasure, cold and heat
Through honour and disgrace

Lift Yourself Up

It would be perfect if all that we ask of life is given to us in a silver plate. Then we can live a blissful life. But for most of us, life is not like that. It is more like a toggle switch. Up and down. On and off. If you are facing the blues, try the things that are listed below. It works. I've use them to prevent me slipping into self-pity mode and remain upbeat.

1. Smile. No matter how beaten you are, smile. Your troubles might not go away but at least you are doing something positive rather than a carry a long sour face.

2. Say Hi. Learn to say Hi to everyone you meet. Engage in small talk. Avoid discussing about your problems. Talk about the weather, the government or the your favourite football club.

3. Read inspiring stories.

4. Exercise. Go jogging or swimming. Give yourself a good physical workout.

5. Movies. Go for a movie or get the DVD of your favourite movie.

6. Songs. Listen to your favourite songs and try singing along.

Keep in mind that there is a season for everything and soon your blues too will pass.

Checklist #1

Bill of Rights for Winners ~ D.S Viscott

1. You have the right to be you-the way you are, the way you want to be.

2. You have the right to grow, to change, to become, to strive, to reach for any goal, to be limited only by your degree of talent and amount of effort.

3.You have the right to privacy-in marriage, family, or any relationship or group-the right to keep a part of your life secret, no matter how trivial or important, merely because you want it to be that way. You have the right to be alone part of each day, each week and each year to spend time with and on yourself.

4. You have the right to be loved and to love, to be accepted, cared for and adored, and you have the right to fulfill that right.

5. You have the right to ask questions of anyone at anytime in any matter that affects your life, so long as it is your business to do so; and to be listened and taken seriously.

6. You have the right to self respect and to do everything you need to do to increase your self-esteem, so long you hurt no one in doing so.

7. You have the right to be happy, to find something in the world that is meaningful and rewarding to you and that gives you a sense of completeness.

8. You have the right to be trusted and to trust and to be taken at your word. If you are wrong, you have the right to be given a chance to make good, if possible.

9. You have the right to be free as long as you act responsibly and are mindful of right of others and of those obligations that you entered into freely.

10. You have the right to win, to succeed, to make plans, to see those plans fulfilled, to become the best you can possibly become.

Incentives

In their bestselling book, Freakonomics, Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner wrote, "An incentive is a bullet, a lever, a key: an often tiny object with astonishing power to change a situation."

It is true isn't it? Whenever there is a change in anything, there is an incentive for that change. You wouldn't change your job, your car or your wife/husband if there wasn't an incentive for doing that. Incentives comes in many forms, money and sex being the obvious.

MLM companies are raking in billions per year using money, freedom and a life of leisure as incentives. Politicians use incentives to get your votes. Religion works on incentives. Be good and you will be strolling in the gardens of paradise. Be a sinner and you are roasted meat.

In short, incentives rules our world (Mr. Bush might not agree). If you have proper incentives for the things you want others to do for you, you will always get what you want.

Inspirational Writings # 2

My Declaration of Self Esteem ~ Virgina Satir

I am me.

In all the world, there is no one exactly like me. There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up exactly like me. Therefore, everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone chose it.

I own everything about me-my body, including everything it does; my mind, including all its thoughts and ideas; my eyes, including the image of all they behold; my feelings, whatever they may be-anger, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement; my mouth, and all the words that come out of it, polite, sweet or rough, correct, incorrect;my voice, loud or soft; and all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself.

I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears.

I own all my triumph and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By doing so I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts. I can then make it possible for all of me to work in my best interest.

I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know. But as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for the solutions to the puzzles and for ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at the given moment in time is me. This is authentic and represents where I am at the moment in time.

When I review later how I looked and sounded, what I said and did, and how I thought and felt, some parts may turn out to be unfitting. I can discard that is unfitting, and keep that which proved fitting, and invent something new for that which I discarded.

I can see, hear, think, say and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me.

I own me, and therefore I can engineer me.

I am me and I am okay.

Inspirational Writings # 1

Fight One More Round ~ James J. Corbett

Fight one more round. When your feet are so tired that you have to shuffle back to the center of the ring, fight one more round. When your arms are so tired that you can hardly lift your hands to come to guard, fight one more round. When your nose is bleeding and your eyes are black and you are so tired that you wish your opponent will crack you one in the jaw and put you to sleep, fight one more round- remembering that the man who always fight one more round is never whipped.

Writings of Great Men # 1

LIFE ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Man comes into this world without his consent and leaves against his will. On earth he is misjudged and misunderstood. In his infancy he is an angel, in boyhood he is a devil, in manhood he is a fool. If he has a wife and family he is a chum. If he is a bachelor, he is inhuman and mean. If he enters a public house he is a drunkard. If he does not, he is temperance and fanatic and a miser. If he is poor man, he has no brains. If he is rich, he has all the luck in the world and also a crook. If he has brains, he is considered too smart. If he gives to church, he is a hypocrite.If he doesn't, he is a sinful man. If he gives to charity or does a good thing, he does for advertisement. If he does not, he is stingy and mean. When he comes to this world everybody wants to kiss him but before he leaves everyone wants to kick him. If he dies too young, then there is a great future in front of him. If he lives too long to a ripe old age, everybody hopes he has made a will. It is therefore impossible to please everyone, so do your duty and be fearless. Use your own common sense and even if you do a mistake it is better than doing nothing. Keep smiling, nobody wants to hear about your troubles, they have wagon loads of their own. So this is life.

CONFIDENCE

We make way for the man who boldly pushes past us - Christian Bovee

Often the only thing between a life of mediocrity and greatness is the amount of confidence in a man. Of all qualities that is needed to achieve success, confidence in oneself is the most important quality to have. Look at all the champions we know, past and present, the one quality they all share is confidence in their ability.

Goethe wrote, “ Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid.”

A person without confidence will never attempt anything that is worthwhile. He will stand by and miss out on the fun, opportunities and growth that life has to offer.
The one factor that gnaws and chews on a person’s confidence is fear. When a person is exposed to too much negative experiences, his confidence takes a beating and if he does not pause and put things in proper perspective, fear sets in. This fear, left unchecked will grow the next time a person goes through a negative experience. The more fear a person has the less confidence he will have in himself and lesser confidence the greater the fear is. This vicious cycle, if not stopped, can drive to self destruction.

In order to have greater self confidence, fear must first be destroyed. The two steps strategy to eliminate fear as proposed Dr. David J. Schwartz in his book “The Magic of Thinking Big” are:

1. Isolate fear. Identify exactly what is the fear and write it down. Analyze it and look at it

objectively.

2. Take action. Do the necessary. Every fear has some kind remedy.

Tips on building self confidence.

1. Accept yourself. Know and love yourself.

2. Believe in yourself. Affirm yourself and flush out negative thoughts.

3. Acknowledge your accomplishment. Keep a success journal.

4. Reward yourself. Treat yourself to something nice each time pulling through a challenge.

5. Speak up

6. Visualize your goals

7. Do not compare yourself with others

8. Always make eye contact

9. Have proper perspective of people and things

10. Be prepared

11. Walk a little faster

12. Be a front seater

13. Be a expert in something

14. Depersonalise failure. Lo0k upon your failure as a step forward.

15. Smile big

SELF IMAGE

Self Image is the picture we hold in our mind about ourselves. This picture is drawn by our experience in life, our success and failures, the thoughts we have of ourselves and by how others react to us. Zig Ziglar in his book, See You at the Top, points out, “You cannot consistently perform in a manner that is inconsistent with the way you see yourself.”

The world is a reflection of ourselves. How others treat us is determined by how we treat ourselves. How we treat ourselves is in turn determined by how we see ourselves. When we have a healthy self image, we treat ourselves with love and respect. We believe that we deserve to be respected and trusted and others will respond accordingly.

There are a myriad of factors that contributes to a person having a poor self image. The most common factors are as below:

1. We live in a negative world

2. Being unjustly ridiculed by friends, teachers or others in authority

3. Exposed to exaggerated series of negative statements

4. Equating failure in behaviour with as failure of self

5. Unrealistic and unfair comparison with others

This world, at times, can be really tough and cruel. We fight many battles outwardly and inwardly everyday. We must keep our chins up and always see ourselves as winners.

It is of great importance to our self development and future success that we maintain a positive outlook about ourselves. The list below indicates that our self image needs some improvement.

1. Negative self talk

2. Failure to give compliments

3. Failure to receive compliments

4. Inability to give and enjoy affection

5. Constantly comparing ourselves with others

6. Feeling guilty most of the time

7. Not asking for what we want

We must continuously work on maintaining a healthy self image. Listed below are just several ways that can help us boost our self image:

1. Always talk good about yourself

2. Accept and give compliments

3. Praise yourself. Acknowledge your value

4. Treat your body well

5. Treat yourself and others well

6. Keep good people close by

7. Read inspiring books

8. Always maintain a positive outlook on yourself

9. Forgive and forget

10. Focus on what you can do and not what you can’t

PROACTIVE

The word proactive was first used by Dr. Viktor Frankl in his 1946 book Man's Search for Meaning.

Proactive as given by Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English, Fourth Edition, 2005 :

proactive - adj ; making things happen or change rather than reacting to events

Proactive as given by Meriam-Webster Online Dictionary :

1[1pro-] : relating to, caused by, or being interference between previous learning and the recall or performance of later learning

2[2pro- + reactive] : acting in anticipation of future problems, needs, or changes
— pro·ac·tive·ly adverb

Stephen Covey in his excellent book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, names proactive as Habit # 1. Proactive is not merely taking the initiave. Proactive means:

1. We are responsible for our own lives

2. To act and not wait to be acted upon

3.To acknowledge mistakes, correct it and learn from it.

A proactive person puts himself in charge of his life. He realises that there is gap between stimulus and response. He is driven by values. When there is an obstacle of any kind in front of a proactive person, he does not wait for the government, his employer, his wife or his neighbour's mother- in -law to move it. He works on removing the obstacle himself or at least try circumventing it.

A proactive person puts his total effort on things that are under his direct control using the four human endowments which are:

1. Self Awareness

2. Conscience

3. Creative Imagination

4. Independent Will

A proactive person makes a promise and strives to keep it, sets a goal and works to achieve it. He does not get distracted or loses his motivation when things doesn't go his way due to circumstances beyond his control. Unlike a reactive person, a proactive person is the captain of his ship and he decides his own destination.

The spirit of proactive action for me is best captured by the quote below.

" Do your best in whatever you do,

with whatever you have,

wherever you are"

~ George Bernard Shaw